Self Censorship is not a Bad Thing

I don't care if you think that


I have "really blossomed,"


or

I am "definitely bigger than most pregnant women at 5 months."


Keep it to yourself.

An Unexpected First

Today my soon-to-be 6 year old asked me to help him write his first "love" note to his "friend" at school.

It read,

"Sami, Nate has another girlfriend that he wants to marry. Her name is Eva. Jack"

I. AM. DYING.

How can you help

but love these little faces? I really don't think that it is my mama-bias talking.





Pictures credit goes to my friend Rane, new photographer extraordinaire. More photos of my darling boys on her site.

Tradition!

Can't you just hear it Fiddler on the Roof style?

This post by Rachael inspired me to finally blog about something that has been on my mind... family traditions. I know my family had them, although they were more of the informal sort, the kind I don't necessarily think of as traditions but just think that is how things are done... you know? The downside of this approach is that I tend to forget a lot of things or don't take the time to do them in a way that makes them special for my family. I'm working hard on doing better, but it takes a conscious effort. My Jack's birthday is coming up, so here are a couple of "traditions" I want to continue or start for a birthday:

cake for breakfast! (thanks to my mom for that one)
decorated bedroom door
balloons all day, not just for the party

I would love to hear what kinds of things you do for your family to make their birthdays special. It can be something that you save for one special birthday, like Rachael, or something you do every birthday. Thanks for your ideas!

Wow.

Today I am almost giddy with excitement. I am not sure I have felt this way about politics, ever. I am so proud of our country. I think Nor summed up a lot of my thoughts beautifully, here. I love that Obama inspires hope.

Time for an Update!

Drumroll please.....

We

are

having

a

BOY.

Number 3 in case you have lost track.

Quite frankly, I went into shock. But at least now you know to suggest boy names.

Here is where I make an announcement

Yes, I'm pregnant! 4 months or so. And while exciting, I make my blog announcement so I can share this funny story.

The boys are SO EXCITED and they ask everyday whether I know yet if it is a girl baby or a boy baby (I don't). Sam wants a boy baby and Jack wants a girl baby. The good news is, one of them will get what they want. They also want to discuss names, and let me tell you, they are quite opinionated about it. They have all sorts of ideas that I don't like, and so far they don't like any of my name choices either.

To almost every name idea, Sam says "That's a bad name, mama. BAD. NAME."

I suggested to Jack we name a girl "Lane." We could call her "Laney," I told him.
"LANEY C***? Mom, that totally sounds like LAMEY C***!"

I laughed and laughed. Of course, the new nickname might be enough to rule out the name entirely. Aren't they helpful?

If you haven't experienced our naming process before, we come up with lots of ideas and hardly share them at all. We put up a list in the hospital and make everyone vote. Then we choose at the last minute right before we have to leave the hospital (and that is the deadline so I don't have to go back and redo the paperwork later), and ignore the results of the vote entirely. Want to participate in the fun? Bring on your name ideas!*

* Paige is already on the list, but we will still let Paige take credit for suggesting it.

I like bags, too!*

do you {like} bags? if you're anything like me, my mom, or my sisters, you are on a lifelong quest for the PeRFeCT bag.

www.handbagplanet.com

win a free bag!! maybe. i can't guarantee anything, but it's worth a shot and they are giving away 1 bag per hour. you've got nothing else to do, right?

*for purposes of full disclosure, I copied this post entirely from my sister, Alisa. But I'm sure she won't mind!

This one is for Paige

How could I resist posting after reading Paige's confession-post? Let me know if you want to chip in to buy this darling and fashionable shirt for her. I am sure she loves gold foil and has jewelry to match. Of course, that means I would have to find the site again, but I am willing to make sacrifices for my friend.

Pressure

Meet Fluffy*, the beloved Kindergarten class rabbit.


Fluffy just spent the weekend at our house, under our care, and under the watchful eye of our dogs. Talk about pressure! Craig thought we should look into finding an identical replacement bunny before agreeing to take him home, you know- just in case. Fluffy is one of two things (the other being recess) that I have heard about in Kindergarten since school started, so how could I deny Jack the opportunity to bring him home?


I'm happy to report that all went well and Fluffy has been returned safely to the Kindergarten class. Whew!


*Full disclosure: this is actually a picture of a bunny who vaguely resembles Fluffy, because I can't download my pictures from my camera right now. Fluffy might be even cuter than this bunny.

I should have taken a picture

Yesterday, September 22, my children celebrated the arrival of fall by wearing both Halloween shirts and Halloween socks. We broke the rules, but they were so excited about it.

Where in the world is....?

OK, how sick are you of the nekkid yoga post? Very. I don't even look at my blog anymore, and probably neither do you!

Where have I gone? you ask. Traveling the world? Home sick in bed? Dealing with STUFF (and yes it deserves capital letters)? Watching way too many hours of the Olympics? Yes to all of the above. And as usual I have totally shirked my blogging duties. Lame, I know.

I do have some fun things to report on, but instead for today- and just in case you haven't seen this story all over the blogosphere- here is a link to help this beautiful family. Stephanie (Nie Nie) and Christian Nielson, parents of four young children, were in a plane crash about two weeks ago. They survived but have severe burn injuries. Today there are fund raisers all over the internet to help with their recovery fund. Here are a couple of links:

Design Mom has a bunch of great auctions going on.
CJane (Nie Nie's sister) has a BYU auction and also all of the updates on the Nielson family.

I don't know the Nielsons and had only read the Nie Nie Dialogues for a short time before the plane crash, but I am so impressed with her zest for life, her family, and the gospel. I have been touched by the outpouring of love and support for them and the amazing strength of her family. Truthfully, I just can't get over this story and hope and pray they will be ok. So check out their sites and see if there is anything you think you could do to help.

Show Your Asana

I'm confused, astounded, and mostly, entertained. By what you ask? Why, this article here discussing the trend of n*ked yoga, n*ked dining, and n*ked comedy clubs. What did I say? Yes, I said N*KED. YOGA. N*KED. DINING. N*KED. COMEDY. (no pun intended)

Let's break this down. People are doing yoga, n*ked, in a class, together. Have you ever been to a yoga class? Can you imagine??? That is a lot of exposure of parts I truly don't want to see. Ponder for a moment downward dog and triangle pose. What if there is an "open air toot" (as my sis calls them)? The thought is too much!!! Let's hope at least there are no mirrors. I'm also relieved to see that you have to bring your own mat. I mean, could you imagine having to use a studio's mat knowing that some of the classes are n*ked?

Moving on, I don't know which is worse between n*ked yoga and n*ked dining. Pro for dining: There are tables and chairs to cover people's parts. Con for dining: You are trying to EAT, surrounded by n*ked people. Totally disgusting. And how do they sanitize the chairs? This one put me over the edge.

Lastly, n*ked comedy. I'll bet the comedian gets a lot of laughs! This one I think is just plain weird.

Post scrips: There are a lot of hits if you google "n*ked yoga." I didn't dare click on most of them, especially if there was the hint of a picture.

Thanks to my friend Tammara for sharing this story with me. I'm glad to have someone with whom to share my amazement and disgust!

So sleepy

I have a problem. It is caused by two things:

1. I LOVE this show. I can't dance, at all, and really wish I could. So I watch in awe.

2. I fall asleep after about 3 dance numbers.

It takes me days and days to get through one episode. I can't fall behind, so every night I muddle through. Do you think it is because I start watching it on tivo about 11 pm? Can someone help me work this into my schedule better? I find this very annoying.

Here, Fishy Fishy

At last! A very delinquent travelogue post about our 4th of July trip to the family cabin. We went to Island Park, Idaho, which has to be one of the most beautiful places on earth.


We fished.



We swam, and discovered there are leeches (!!) in the lake.



We kayaked.



We saw a geyser.



We got bitten by mosquitoes.



We saw lots of buffalo (and almost a bear!), played games with Grandma C and Aunt Julie, rode the 3-wheeler, fed the fish, watched a parade, and had a great time!

Snapshots of Young Artists

You can tell when your 5 year old son has been using your camera...



You can also tell when your 3 year old son has been using your camera...


Think these are future photographers?

The Countdown

We are on countdown to vacation. We have been for months (how many more days, mom? 98) but it is finally almost here!

About 6 weeks ago, my cute, creative, and kid-less sister suggested that we make a paper chain to mark all of the days until vacation. The boys were so excited. For about 3 minutes. Then I spent an hour cutting and gluing paper chains together. The boys were also excited about tearing off one chain a day. For about 3 days. And then I had to go back and mark rings to help us keep track of where we are. Now our vacation is so close that I can easily count how many days are left until we leave, without consulting the calendar. Hooray!

Didn't I do a great job?

Now, here is the really important part of the post. I need ideas for books to take on vacation. In all actuality this is actually a family trip, not vacation, but I am still hoping for time to read on the beach. My reading list is about 2 years behind the curve, so don't be afraid to suggest something that has been around for a while. Except for the Twilight series, I've got that one covered.

Breaking Dawn will be released while we are in Florida. I'll have to pick it up there.

I'm not sure who is still reading my sporadic posts, but this is a test of your friendship. I am that desperate for ideas. Is that as bad as the threats at the end of all chain emails? I'm trying to induce some guilt here, peeps! Thanks for your help!

Sweet treat

Oh, how my soul was filled with joy upon finding this at my local grocery store....

Add a little of this...

Heaven on a spoon.

If you haven't tried it you don't know what you are missing. Here is my tip- just swirl the honey on top, don't mix it in. Then you get the tart yogurt with the sweet honey and distinct flavor and texture. Sigh.

(I did buy the fat free variety and not the full fat version, which is what I am sure I enjoyed all over Greece. It turns out ignorance is bliss in the nutritional information department).

Places I go

Gratuitous picture of cute kid, crazy uncle.

I'm back from my accidental blogging hiatus. I'm not sure what happened, but all of a sudden it is a month later .... and here we are.
While I haven't been blogging, I have been reading, so I thought I would share some of the places I go. Here are a few posts that I particularly liked lately. Enjoy!

Gurrbonzo mixing religion and politics (I highly recommend this post and clicking through to the Chronicle link- very well written, and will be particularly enjoyed by a couple of the Green-bomb sisters).

Smitten Kitchen's Dulce de leche ice cream - Heavenly (while posted prior to my blogging hiatus, the ice cream was made during the hiatus so it still counts).

Stephanie is so busy and so blessed! (And her husband is THE BEST!)

More of the same here by "seriously, so blessed." This blog seems sort of familiar for some reason. Maybe it is one of my sister's links?

Natalie's memo re: Church PDA. I am still scarred from the UCLA ward action.

I made this chicken and these cookies.

Notorious Lenore and her notorious bikini collection. All I can say is, wow.

Paige threw the party of the year, no kidding. Scroll down to the end for the best picture.

And last but not least, Cassidy's summary of our Memorial Day activities. Yes, it was fun and meaningful and involved darling children, but I link to highlight the lady in the last picture. Holy cow!


(If I linked to your post and you prefer I not, just let me know and I'll delete it.)

Consequences

"Mom, if you don't take me to 7-11 tonight to get a slurpee, then I won't go to Disney World on our trip."

"If you don't let me watch a show right now, I won't watch TV ever again."



Someone doesn't quite get it.

They've got the look

Now seems like an entertaining time to introduce you to my pets. First up are the puppies, Marley and Boone. Marley and Boone had an unfortunate meeting with a lady armed with only her shears and the crazy idea that Golden Retrievers should be groomed to look like Poodles.

Notice their bare bodies, but furry heads and feet. Poor Marley lost his tail as well.

Not to be outdone, George the Cat decided to make a statement in dirt-roll chic. He is usually pure white.

The Squishy

Look who I finally get to meet! My new niece, baby Nancy, also known as "The Squishy." Apparently she is little and soft, and (wait for it) squishy. I can't wait! I can't wait!

On other news, please check out my sister, Alisa's, blog, for pictures of world's cutest children.

iSucker

Should I be embarrassed to admit that the first music I have ever paid to download onto my iTunes is David Cook? I picked up a few other songs as well, such as Jason's "Hallelujah." I was highly motivated by the claim that they were taking the songs off iTunes as of the finale. This is also the reason for my growing collection of Disney movies and infomercial products. I am a sucker.

Also, I may be totally infatuated with David Cook. Love him.

The Outfit

So here are some not so great pictures of my fabulous outfit. As I mentioned, this outfit can take almost exclusive credit for my going through with the triathlon, and I'm so glad I did.

First, here is me heading towards the finish.

Notice the skirt in action. Do not notice the chubby legs below the skirt. Notice the 5 year old son trying to keep up with his "fast" mom. So I feel a little bad about that part, but I was sprinting for the finish. I couldn't afford to stop!

Me after the finish wearing my favorite visor. Same company. Notice the same outfit on the lady behind me to the right. She is wearing the same outfit, polka-dot version, as also worn by Nicole DeBoom here. As I predicted, the polka-dot version was very popular.

My friend, Lindsey, and me after the race.

Definitely a highlight of the race.

Sweet victory

I am a triathlete!

I will admit, I was not quite ready for this triathlon and had not trained nearly enough. Because I'm not very athletic anyway, for me it is a big deal just to get out there and try. Plus, I had invested in the outfit, so I wasn't about to back out!

I'll spare you the play-by-play, but suffice it to say I had a hard time. I signed up with my friend Lindsey, but we separated at the swim. I thought I would catch her on the bike but I never did. I was on my own and I was lonely. I didn't ever find myself in a rhythm with anyone else, and no music on the course. I had a long time to curl up with my own thoughts. There was a big hill in the first of the course that we rode up twice on the bike and then had to run. I'll be honest- that hill kicked my butt. Coming around the second loop, I briefly considered crying when I was on my way to the hill. I finished the bike wanting to feel great, but instead dreaded the run up the hill. As I was leaving the transition area, Craig called to me asking if I was ok and I could barely answer. Then my dad was there with a high five and words of advice , "Mental toughness! You can do this! This is nothing compared to a marathon!"

I started to run, and then walked, then ran. And then I met the hill for the third time. My dad would challenge me to charge the hill and this time I didn't have the heart. I was feeling a little discouraged and slow. My body was tired, but it was my head that was holding me back. From my experience with the marathon, I knew this was a mental game, and I wasn't in it. As I trudged up the hill I started thinking about whether I was mentally tough enough to do this, and that if I finished I would be a triathlete, just like I am a marathoner. And then I suddenly got it- it was all about me. And only me! It wasn't about my husband, or my kids, or my friend. It wasn't about whether I was good enough, or spiritual enough, or smart enough, or skinny enough, or fast enough. It wasn't about my work, or my house, or my to-do list, or mistakes I have made. It was just me and the run, and the only question was whether I was going to do it or not. And I got to decide. I could do it and nobody else could do it for me. I could give up if I wanted to. So I started to run, and I felt great. And then I loved it!

I met up with Heather on the run which was an unexpected boost. She was happy and totally inspirational. And she probably thought I was a little crazy because I was well into my self-coaching when I saw her, but that is ok. Because this time, it really is all about me. And I rock.

Now, click over to Heather's post for her story of inspiration and a very entertaining recap of the triathlon.

Pictures of the hot outfit to come.

I am Tri-trying!

So my very first triathlon is Saturday! In this picture you will see me with a very darling Nicole DeBoom of triathlete fame. I had to get a picture with her because she rocks and Craig bugs me to get a picture with her every time we have seen her (all of twice now), and she was very gracious of my geeky request. Since I didn't have my camera, my friend Lindsey took the picture with my phone, so it is hard to tell just how darling she is, but you could check her out here. When I asked for her picture she said that the ladies usually ask for a photo with her hubby, Ironman Champion Tim DeBoom. That is ok, because I got the picture of her for mine...


Not only is she awesome, but she started a company that makes my favorite running gear, Skirtsports. Even though I'm not a great athlete, their cute gear makes me feel fabulous and fast. I told her that her stuff was my favorite (did I gush too much or what!), and I think she was flattered and maybe almost teary.

I haven't done a great job of training for this triathlon, but my theory is that the more I invest the more committed I am (i.e. I won't back out even though it may really suck), so I had already ordered these darling triathlon top, bottom, and (most importantly) skirt, for the race. Truth be told, I'll look a little lumpy and squishy for the swim and bike (hopefully I'll be too fast for anyone to notice, ha ha), but I will look hot on the run! The only downside was that, as you can see in the picture, Nicole wore her darling gear to her presentation at the packet pickup, so the outfit was flying off the racks at the store. However, she showed off the polka-dot top and I bought the floral print skirt, so hopefully I will still stand out in the crowd. If I can't be fast, at least I'll look good.

Wish me luck!

It's all about me, me, me!

For my milestone 5th post (ha ha!), 5 things (+15) you may not know about me, in no particular order:

1. I am a mom to two monkey boys.
2. I am a binge shopper.
3. I love diaper bags. When traveling on business I use a diaper bag instead of a briefcase.
4. I think I am thinner than I appear in pictures. Please tell me so.
5. I love to sing loudly in my car and dance wildly to 80's music.
6. My "theme song" right now is "It's my life" by Bon Jovi. It is also my ring tone on my phone. I am not ashamed to admit it. My love for 80's rockers (along with my sisters') is documented by Alisa.
7. I am the least funny sister and maybe the most bossy.
8. I hate Wal-Mart. I love Target.
9. When on vacation my plans revolve around where I want to eat.
10. I have trouble with daily technology use. For example, I don't know how to use most features on my phone and had to be tutored by my 15 year old niece. I also don't know how to load songs onto my iPod and am at Craig's mercy in music selection (even though he has tried to teach me several times).
11. My proudest achievement, other than having children, is running a marathon.
12. I love to make friends and am frequently over inclusive.
13. I read blogs but don't often comment (I know, that sucks!).
14. Getting a massage is one of my favorite things in the whole world.
15. I am a huge procrastinator. I think I will work on this, but never seem to get to it. Seriously.
16. I frequently do very embarrassing things, and can't help but share the stories. See this example. Now good blog fodder.
17. I am a partner in a law firm. This makes me feel like I should be older and more mature than I think I am.
18. I am intimidated by stylish dressers, and wish I was one.
19. I recently took up biking and am training for my first triathlon.
20. I love to read but am about 4 years behind on the latest and greatest.

There you go! Now if I meet you in real life (e.g. at blogapalooza) you can pretend we are lifelong friends.

American Crush

It is cliche, but I must share my thoughts on Idol. While I miss Matthew Johns (that hair!), I must declare my love for David C.- overdone 5 o'clock shadow and all. His voice really gets me (sigh). When Carly closes her eyes and reaches for the big notes, she looks like a rat pulling taffy out of her mouth. Great voice, but I can't get over that face, or her terrible stylist (last night excepted). Poor, poor Brooke. Loved her in the Carly Simon phase. Now when she pouts I want to grab her lips and squeeze them together. Jason I love as long as he isn't talking. That's all folks. I would post pictures, but am not sure how to do that without violating copyright restrictions.

Oh, and you know the saying, never put anything smaller than your elbow in your ear? Because while you are cleaning your 5 year old son's ear and he moves suddenly, you just might puncture his eardrum? Yeah. True story. Mother of the year, right here.

(Please don't notice that my boys are sitting on the kitchen counter, or you might feel the need to report me to child protective services after my last two posts. I swear I was right there the whole time!)

A New Low

So this past week, I have had trouble coming up with blog-ideas. It seemed that before I started a blog, I had lots of funny stories and profound thoughts to share over my blog. So I start a blog, and .... nothing.

Then this past weekend, I had ideas! Lots of ideas! On Friday, I got to visit with my old friend Amy, whom I never (and I mean never) get to see. It was a last minute random chance event, and it was SO fun. So when Jack, Sam, and her daughter, Tessa, were racing down the neighbor's driveway on little plasma cars, laughing their guts out, I thought- this is perfect! I'll blog about it! Alas, no camera. Amy took a few pictures, but I won't hold my breath to see them (you know I love you, Amy!). We then took our 6 combined kids (4 are hers, 3 are triplets!) to Carl's Jr. with a playground for lunch and sat and chatted for hours. It was great.

On Saturday, Craig ran the SL Marathon and my dad ran the half-marathon, which generated new blog-ideas. I even took pictures.

(I could have posted a picture of Craig running, but wanted to prove I have a second son)

Saturday night we went to a birthday party for one of Jack's friends, and Sam tried to bring his girlfriend home with us. Definitely blog worthy. I also went to a late dinner with my friend Heather, who told me hilarious stories that should be published but I couldn't do justice in retelling them.

Yesterday was my brother, Phillip's (he prefers Phil) family birthday dinner. Since I am new to blogging, I realized that I should have done a b-day shout-out to my bro. Another blog-idea.

(Sam's outfit is for another post!)

Then before I had the chance to write any one of these fantastic post, I experienced a new low. And it was low. Those of you that know the real life me know that I have children who wander. Well, tonight, Jack convinced me that he needed to go to Wal-Mart to replace two favors from the birthday party that had already broken. Normally I would tell him tough luck, but since Sam broke one of them and Jack cried and cried, I agreed to replace them. The birthday boy told Jack that the favors came from Wal-Mart. So after dinner, there we are, in my most hated place on earth. The Dreaded Wal-Mart, or alternatively, Wal-Mart-He**, I call it. And the Wal-Mart by our house isn't even a nice Super Wal-Mart- it is old and yucky.

We are in the toy aisle, which is next to the bike rack. Jack and I are scouring the aisles for the replacement toys, while Sam is looking at the bikes. I think Craig is with Sam. Craig then joins us in the toy aisle, where we discuss the fact that the replacement toys are no where to be found. I ask him where Sam is. I don't know, he says. He walks back to the bikes, no Sam. He looks in the aisles around the bikes, no Sam. I thought he was with you! I cry, as I frantically start looking up and down the aisles, hollering Sam's name. Unfortunately, my running around like a crazy woman screaming Sam's name is not new to me. Thankfully, I have no shame. Craig has headed the other direction looking for Sam. I am running now, wondering if I should find a sales person to have the store locked down, and thinking that I will run into someone to help me as I am yelling my son's name.

And then I hear it... Attention, Wal-Mart shoppers, we have a lost little boy. He is about 2 years old, with longish brown hair. He is wearing a blue Champion shirt. Please come to customer service. SAM! Craig claims him, and asks where they found him. By the bikes, they say. My little wanderer didn't even wander off, he was just picked up! Fortunately it was by a diligent Wal-Mart worker and not a psychopath. This does not actually make me feel better.

And there it is, my new low. I lost my kid in Wal-Mart and they announced him as a lost child over the intercom system. I'm getting better at this blogging thing though- while I didn't think to take a picture of him at Wal-Mart, I did when we got him home. Here he is, oblivious to his narrow escape.


I didn't even get to purchase a copy of Juno with the special music CD extra. I just wanted to get out of there.

[On the blog-learning curve, please note the pictures in the posts. Someone please help me rotate them. Next, hyperlinks, courtesy of Shannan.]

Confession

Post #2, no accompanying picture. Here is the confession... I lied. I most like will break every blogging "rule" time and again. Too bad. Here is what I just learned. The button at the bottom of blogspot that says, "Now Blogger saves your drafts automatically!" also lies. You must push the Save Now button for that to happen. So you will never know the amazing and hilarious post that was previously drafted, only to be lost forever. Oh wait, it was actually saved as a draft, but my story is it was deleted and I'm sticking to it.

I did figure out how to post a picture with my darling 3 year old. I can't find a picture of me with both my sons, so it appears that I am playing favorites. As for the links, I posted a link to you if you are on my reader and I think you are amusing. If you don't want to be linked, just let me know. I'm not easily offended so don't worry about asking. Almost all of my links are somehow related to Paige. She is quite the connector. My blog is not yet "the cutest blog on the block" (apparently a site designed to help deficient bloggers like myself), but I need something to aspire to, right?

ETA: Thanks to my sis, Alisa, for the cute background! Next, hyperlinking...

Let the games begin!

Hello, internet! I have contemplated blogging for a while now, for a few reasons. One, my sisters all have blogs, and I can't stand to be left out. Two, my friend, Paige, keeps harassing me. Three, I plan to attend blogapalooza and feel sheepish about not having a blog, especially since I feel like I "know" many of the women who will be there and they don't know me. Lastly, I have random thoughts on about everything that I feel should be shared with the world, or at least with my sisters (who will no doubt be my most loyal, if only, readers).

For my first post, I need help figuring out the rules of blogging (to the extent they exist!) I expect that many will be explained to me by the Greenbaum gals.

1. Post often, preferably everyday, but at least every couple of days. I'll do my best on this one, but I am a huge procrastinator without a lot of free time. Which would explain why I am one of the last people on earth to attempt a blog.

2. Posts must contain a picture. This again might be a problem for me, but I'll do my best.

3. The blog must be public. I can already hear the complaints that would ensue if I attempted to make this private. However, I am somewhat paranoid, so you won't get to know everything about me and my family.

4. I can tell stories about my kids, but not every post can be about my kids. As a heads up, it is highly unlikely that you will see any "I am the luckiest woman on the face of the earth and absolutely fawn over my husband and children every moment and I lead the perfect life" posts. Just ain't me. Neither is saying "ain't".

5. Hyperlink whenever possible. I obviously haven't figured this one out yet.

6. Comment when reading others' blogs.

So, how did I do? What else do I need to know? For example, what are the rules on linking to other blogs in the sidebar? Do I link to everyone I know? People I like to read? People who comment on my blog?

You may sense that I plan to rebel against the blog rules. Not true, I am not that rebellious. But I do like to set expectations low so that I can meet or exceed them. I also like lists, and others' opinions on everything. So prepare to ante up! And expect to learn more about me next post.